Just Being A Mom, Mommy Thoughts

Just Some Random Mommy Thoughts

mommy-thoughts-baby-sitting-careDid you know that there’s actually a way to measure how a state truly takes care of moms? Yes, it’s true. You better believe it.

As a matter of fact, there is actually an interesting service that shares just how mom friendly each state in the US really is. You can use this particular service to see how your state ranks on several issues important to the health and well-being of moms and children.

Now it gets really interesting because it judges each state using parameters relevant to every mother’s needs. Take a look at this.

Each state is judged on several criteria to determine their overall score. Access to prenatal care, maternal mortality, risk of pregnancy complications, childcare availability, infant mortality, air quality, violent crime rate, access to health insurance, affordable children’s health insurance, and the state’s mandatory paid leave policies are all picked over and compared to give a breakdown of how the individual states add up.

Did you actually think something like this existed? I personally had no idea something like this existed.

It sounds like an ideal world, almost too perfect to be true. However, if you think about it, it should really be the case. Easy accessibility to prenatal care and other health and medical issues should always be made available. There’s no question about that.

In my personal opinion, there is accessibility to prenatal care and other health and medical issues. As long as there are hospitals around, there is always accessibility to prenatal care and other health and medical issues. Now does that make a state more mom friendly? Maybe it does, maybe it doesn’t.

It’s ironic that my own state came in near the bottom of the heap. Access to prenatal care and health care coverage are ranked as our worst issues. I do wonder exactly who they are including in their results of access to prenatal care.

Did they count midwives in their numbers? Not that it would add much but it does matter specially if some moms have to drive over an hour in labor to get to the nearest midwife. Would that, in any way, affect the scores of just how mom friendly a state is?

It’s almost the same thing if the topic is childcare. When it comes to childcare, I think it’s pretty hard to measure just how a state is making it more accessible to moms.

Come to think about it, how can a state actually ensure that there is easy childcare accessibility? In my opinion, that’s pretty hard to gauge.

First and foremost, the kind of childcare has to be identified. If easy accessibility to childcare were measured only in terms of the number of daycare centers around, then that wouldn’t make too much sense to me.

I am one of those moms who just don’t believe in daycare centers. I just don’t feel safe leaving my kids in daycare centers. The fact that there are a lot of them around; can cause us to raise a lot of serious questions.

Are these daycare centers safe? When it comes to childcare, accessibility should be equated with safety. Yes, but that’s not all.

Unfortunately, the growing numbers of daycare centers might just make me wonder about the legalities of such establishments. How does the state regulate the proliferation of daycare centers? Are these daycare centers licensed at all?

As a mom who is constantly worrying about the safety of her kids, I would never choose daycare as a form of childcare. I am much better off with a babysitter and as long as I can access Sittercity online, then I am good to go.

As a childcare provider that’s easily accessed online, I don’t have a hard time finding babysitters. I can just sign into my account on Sittercity and look for a babysitter when the need arises. For me, that’s very convenient.

So if all moms from each state rely on Sittercity, it’s safe to say that they have easy accessibility to childcare. That, of course, would make every state mom friendly. By the way, if you are looking into using this babysitting service, you can get some serious discount on Sittercity on some great parenting sites.

The service that identifies just how mom friendly a state is, is not just interesting but intriguing as well. It just makes me wonder how the other states are doing.

In my case, I’m not really bothered that the state I live in is at the bottom of the list. After all, I am signed up with Sittercity.

Nonetheless, it would still be nice to know how each state is measured. From there, we will have a good idea as what the qualifications are for a mom-friendly state. That would really be nice to know.

In addition to that, it would be great to hear from other moms their thoughts about this particular service. Are there any qualifications that should be added?

No matter what is said about the service, one thing is clear. There is always a collective effort to make things a lot easier for moms. If all these states could make it easier, then moms, like us, wouldn’t be so stressed.

Moms deserve an easier life. If there’s a way to make it easier for them, why not show it to them? After all, they deserve every kind of help they can get. I don’t think anyone would disagree to that.

So it really wouldn’t be so out of this world to say that moms need recognition each and every single day they are alive. With all the hard work they put into each and every single day, they need more than enough thank yous.

Moms are just amazing human beings. They’re so amazing that a day doesn’t pass without any of the kids crying out for mom. Mom is the word. So if there’s one day that should really be celebrated, it’s Mother’s Day.

To all you fabulous moms, here’s a trivia for you. Did you know that The Mother’s Day Proclamation was issued in 1870 by Julia Ward Howe? She is one of the three founders of modern Mother’s Day. She’s definitely one mom we should all thank.

There will always be efforts to make moms happy. Well, we deserve it.




Co-Sleeping and Kids, Mommy Thoughts

No Judging Please: My Take On Co-Sleeping

co-sleeping-with-babyHere goes another article on co-sleeping. I just can’t help writing about it. Co-sleeping is really a topic that gets a lot of folks talking and talking. Everybody has his or her own thoughts on it.

Take this for example. Over at Babble, there was an interesting article on sleeping, specifically co-sleeping. The general idea is that co-sleeping leads to sleep problems in children.

Apparently, the said article fails to mention anything about children who did not co-sleep but are still having sleep problems. Furthermore, the said article also ignores the ones who did co-sleep and have had no problems at all. Luckily the comment section has several voices of reason in it.

How a person sleeps is such an individual thing. You can’t really make a collective call on such a sensitive topic. What works for other families may not exactly work for your family.

Furthermore, co-sleeping can be influenced by a thousand other issues and let’s face it; each family has different issues. So it’s really hard to make a make a conclusion about co-sleeping that’s appropriate for all.

No one has the right to impose an kind of sleeping method unless it’s needed. So seeing an article that totally slams co-sleeping is something I can’t really accept

When one makes a conclusion about co-sleeping, one has to consider diet, exercise, and TV viewing. These are just among the things that influence sleeping habits. You also have to take into account the personality of the child.

For me, if a child is having a hard time sleeping alone, there’s no immediate way to resolve it but by having him or her by your side. Unless you want to stay up late or you want the child to cry and cry, then go right ahead and leave the child alone. However, that’s just not the way I want to handle things around here.

My oldest was a great sleeper from the minute he was born. While on the other hand, my youngest hated sleep from the minute he was born. Interestingly, I’m a happy sleeper while their father stays up all night. Our sleeping patterns are blatantly different. However our sleeping patterns have worked so well because my husband takes over when our youngest is up. When he can’t seem to outdo the energy level of the little one, we all end up sleeping on one bed. I know for some, that is an extremely radical way of co-sleeping but it works for us.

However, I would like to justify that with this simple reason. Our youngest just can’t seem to sleep without the comfort of being sandwiched between me and my husband. That is just way things happen around here and for anyone who thinks we’re doing the wrong thing, well, that’s just too bad. We’re not going to change things just because of some loud clamor that gets really irritating at times.

I regularly talk to other moms who co-sleep. What I have seen over and over again is this; there is no real pattern.

Based on all the conversations I have had with a lot of moms, some kids sleep well while some do not. According to some babysitting and parenting experts, some infants who are just a couple of months old are ready to sleep all night. While some babies might need a few years more to get themselves to sleep. It’s the same with potty training. You can’t rush a child to learn it too soon. More often than not, it only leads to frustration.

While I know that co-sleeping does not work for everyone, making blanket statements about it in this way is a bit annoying. Those of us who have chosen that particular sleeping method probably know first hand the many insightful comments people can make when they disagree.

I do have to admit that I was taken off guard when some one commented that leaving an infant to cry for 45 minutes wasn’t all that bad. Maybe to an adult, though I’d be hard pressed to feel that if if my partner left me to cry that long alone I’d be so light about it, but for an infant or young child with no concept of time, 45 minutes might as well be a lifetime. Especially when they are not mature enough to understand what is happening or why.

Now don’t get me wrong. Our co-sleeping patterns don’t mean that I give in to my kids right away. Giving in to my kids by means of co-sleeping is a far-fetched thought. I honestly do not think that my husband and I are giving in. For me and my husband, we are simply dealing with the individual needs of our kids.

I am, not in any way, justifying our ways and means at home. Furthermore, I am not saying that what we are doing is the right thing. I am just saying that it works for us. Also, we are just like any other parents out there who are finding ways and means to make things work.

As a matter of fact, I would like to think that I am just like one of those moms who get easily irked by noisy kids. Yes, our world is totally chaotic and totally NOT perfect

I have been very open about that, having written earlier about getting a little more frustrated lately with my kids I wanted to share this list I found online. Positive Parenting: 10 Ways to Relieve the Stress of Childrearing

It’s a great list with ideas that can help parents stay rested. Admitting that you aren’t perfect and learning to laugh are just some of the many interesting ways to relieve the stress of childbearing.

If you can’t laugh over the silly, weird, odd things kids can and will do; then be prepared for an early stroke. There are a thousand instances when your only options will be to laugh or scream/ So choose wisely.

To say that parenting is easy is a total lie. So for anyone who thinks it’s easy, all I can say is this. Congratulations but keep all your parenting thoughts to yourself unless you have really gotten this whole parenting thing figured out.

It’s hard enough to get thru each day trying to figure out if you’re doing the right thing. It surely gets more irritating if you see people condescendingly telling you that you’re not doing the right thing. That for me is the height of being totally judgmental.


BabySitting Tips, Moms and Breastfeeding

Weighing In On Breastfeeding And Babysitting

babysitting-and-breastfeedingIt makes me a bit proud to see some professionals standing up against companies or institutions that hurt breastfeeding women in the name of profits. These institutions use their usual tactics.

They get with the hospitals to wine and dine with their staff. This way, they get prominent placement and product pushing.

They elbow past any information or support breastfeeding women might have gotten. Instead cans of formula, bottles, products with their names plastered all over. They come up with pamphlets telling women exactly how to wean and switch to formula. These pamphlets are passed out like candies on Halloween.

That kind of public relation technique is very hard to beat. How can a small group of breastfeeding women get their message out when big institutions are collaborating with hospitals to promote their products? If this thing goes on and on, there will be more and more women preferring formula milk.

Again, there is nothing wrong with that. However, women are left with no other options. How fair is that?

We should always have a choice. Hence, there should be enough information about breast milk as much as there is about formula milk.

The groups that are supporting both kinds of milk should be on common ground. They should not be beating each other in getting the information out first. For me, it really shouldn’t work that way because the way an infant should be fed is a very sensitive topic.

As a mom, it’s important to get or gather the right information for herself. When a mom does her own research, she’s not doing it for all the other moms out there. She’s doing it for herself. So what she seeks to learn or to find out is all based on what her needs are.

Obviously, the needs of every mom are very different from each other. So the right information for each mom varies.

It’s just like babysitting. When a mom looks for a babysitter, she looks for one who can fulfill her needs. Looking for the kind of babysitter who can provide personalized service is not easy especially if you are not part of Sittercity.

Sittercity has become the leading resource for childcare simply because it provides every bit of information relevant to a mother’s search.

Sittercity understands how moms seek information to made sound decisions. So that’s why they provide both moms and babysitters a common ground to connect to each other.

There are no dirty tactics on Sittercity. Instead, Sittercity provides credible information for both moms and babysitters to connect to each other.

So what’s my point here? My point is simple. Moms need a lot of credible information to make sound decisions. We don’t want events sponsored by big companies or institutions to promote formula milk. We want studies or researches that can provide us credible information on both formula and breast milk.

Information is wealth. The less information we gather or get from studies and researches will only put us in a position where we are bound to be more ignorant than learned.

When you’re a mom, you don’t want to be ignorant, As a matter of fact, you can’t afford to be ignorant.

With companies and institutions promoting formula milk, it’s hard to gather credible information to make sound decisions. To start with, there is no credible information when a product is being promoted.

With lack of credible information, moms are just left with freebies that promote the product. They can’t grasp any kind of information that can support their decision. They’re just stuck with a product and that’s just not the right way to decide as to the manner an infant should be fed.

The good news is that there are now some hospitals that train nurses in infant feeding. I hope that they will be teaching them how to support breastfeeding moms rather than push formula on them over every little thing.

As long as companies and institutions push their way around to promote their milk products, breastfeeding will continue to be a debatable topic. Hopefully, it will cease to be debatable when it finally stands on common ground with big companies that produce formula milk.

Breast milk shouldn’t really be debatable. There really is nothing to debate about it because it’s good for the baby. What is highly debatable is the NBC show called The Baby Borrowers.

You have probably heard or seen the show. If not, then think Wife Swap, but with infants.

I thought it was really surreal but it did take some time to watch. My heart will be breaking for the young infants who ended up crying with strangers for days, It’s bad enough that the participants played the roles of parents were teenagers; it’s even worse that the babies were borrowed.

Who lends their babies for an experiment? As it is, it’s surreal to leave a baby with a babysitter, more so leave a baby with a bunch of teenagers just for the sake a reality show. How strange is that?

To this day, I am still unable to understand why the parents of the babies have abandoned them. Though the show’s producers have claimed that the parents were just next door; they were not able to step in as needed. Come on. Their children were not old enough to grasp the whole concept of the show.

As you might have guessed there are many people, myself included, who think this is a horrible idea. Taking an infant from their parents, the people he or she has created a deep bond with, and just handing them over to a total stranger. Is this a good idea? Not at all.

I think the show kind of proves how parents are desperate for caregivers. They will go to extremes just so someone can watch over their little ones. That’s a scary thing.

The show has long been cancelled but I just can’t seem to forget it. To this day, I still can’t believe there were parents who had loaned their little ones to complete strangers.

Were they desperate for caregivers? Probably so. Well, they should have just gone with Sittercity instead of signing their little ones up with a reality show.